Word of the Day:霜

I wasn't able to get anything done today. Unfortunately I let my emotions get the best of me and decided to hermit. No harassment, no anything like that. I just got to choked up and backed out.

I watched the normal news and it made me sad. I don't even know why it affected me as much as it did. I thought I was desensitized by stuff already but, I somehow was able to be affected by something. That was self sabotage on my part. It was the one time I felt like maybe I am mentally unwell. But, I think... I will give myself some grace for this. We don't have to go around pretending that nothing affects us all the time.

I felt like I have been in a bouncy house. The energies are just jostling me around. I can't find my bearings and don't know what to do. I have my TODOs so I know that, it isn't like I am without anything but, they don't solve this problem in my heart.

I thought I needed weed to see this one man's form in the Ether. But, I think I actually have already seen it, without realizing it. It is like when frost first affects a bubble in the snow. It's just his eyes I see when I close mine, softly caressing the boundaries of my aura/soul. I've even seen a white beam in my vision at key points. But I don't understand... I don't understand and.. there is nothing I can do.

The Dutch East India Company, known as the VOC (Vereenigde Oostindische Compagnie), was a powerful chartered company established in 1602 to control trade between the Netherlands and Asia. As the world's first multinational corporation and public company, it dominated the spice trade, possessing quasi-governmental powers, including the authority to wage war, build fortresses, and coin money.

I don't understand any of my pings right now... why were people killed? Why am I being pinged about this? Why did I know about Ohio despite never being there?

Yes, it was Hina Matsuri today.... In a perfect world, I could've celebrated with my daughter. But this world is not this way.

He tried.

What? I don't even want to know. I don't want to know anymore... no more.

Maybe it is the influence of the people coming in for appointments this week. I am considering this. It is probably this. Even if this is true, it doesn't mean I am not burdened right now. Knowledge isn't taking anything away. I guess I just have to steel myself for that. I have tonight to do this.

I think I want someone to save me from this, but... that is also something that doesn't exist. Not even the man whose eyes I see. Maybe we will meet again, I don't know. But this is not the time. Not right now.

You don't think I was just supposed to love you?

Bezalel, whose name means "in the shadow of God" (or "under God's protection"), was the chief architect of the Tabernacle in the wilderness, appointed by God and filled with divine wisdom to craft sacred items. Son of Uri and grandson of Hur, he commanded immense skill in metals, stone, and wood, symbolizing the union of spiritual inspiration with artistic craftsmanship.

Divine Empowerment: Bezalel was filled with the Spirit of God, specifically in wisdom, understanding, knowledge, and all manner of workmanship.

Role and Function: He was chosen by God to lead the construction of the Tabernacle, the Ark of the Covenant, and other holy vessels, ensuring they were built according to the pattern shown to Moses.

Symbolism: The phrase "in the shadow of God" suggests he worked under God's direct guidance and protective presence, acting as a master craftsman for the divine dwelling.

Legacy: Bezalel is considered the archetype of the artist-teacher, with his name reflecting a close relationship between divine inspiration and creative work.

Historical Context: He was from the tribe of Judah, and his work, alongside his assistant Oholiab, enabled the Israelites to create a physical space for God to dwell among them.