Dress Me Up

i'm trying ever so hard

not to go up

my own arse

but i wanna be a human

and i wanna buy a mumu

and i apologise if i've triggered any mumu wearers here tonight but you gotta relax, stay real loose and not get into a tizzy.

gotta stop wearing tight jeans

gotta stop watching fright scenes

gotta stop watching washing machine cleans

gotta stop eating dried beans

and now i find it has come to this:

i'm checking myself out

in the early morning mirrors

created where the angle of the sun

matches my lean and catches the gleam

in a coffee shop window

i wont name there is no shame

it's all the same when you play this game

the reflections are directions

an introspective directive

a contradiction affliction

arises and surprises

square holes and wooden pegs

no arse and tranny legs:

indented bum half way up my back

like a cleaved hunch

and legs like an op shop coffee table

this humor i poke

it's all just a joke

and i must confess

i'd look shit in a dress