I Came

i came out

of the beauty store

with a trolley

full of expensive shit

and wouldn't you know it

i’m still as ugly as fuck

i gotta head like a

hat full of arseholes

i came out

of the library

dribbling from my brain

i was supposed

to be broadening my horizons

but i was looking at boobies

in National Geographic

i came out

of the supermarket

with a basket full of kiwi fruit

in a pavlova kind of mood

but i’m not going back for cream

or any kind of highly processed

disco meat delicacies

(no, not for the Pav!)

i came out

of your mums house

all prim and proper

what were you thinking?

no hanky panky

no funny business

i like your mum

she’s a nice lady